Were you at the store, church, your office, a mom’s group or some other outing today and noticed that “one” lady…the “it” lady you couldn’t help compare yourself to? She seemed to have it all together. You spotted her as she came in and immediately wished you were as fit and lean as her, had her perfectly curled and colored hair, her stylish clothes, her money (She’s gotta be loaded!), children that behaved as well as hers, and so on and so on. She literally seemed perfect, and we’re….well, pretty much the definition of a “hot mess.” We’re suddenly in that dangerous trap of comparison.
Sisters, let’s not compare ourselves to that “perfect” woman. Let me tell you, she’s really not. Appearances can be very deceiving. Maybe just maybe she came from the hair salon that very morning, after being four months past due for a coloring. She was excited to have nicely colored and curled hair for a change. The clothes she was wearing could possibly be one of two nice outfits that she owns. She’s usually in sweats or yoga pants at home with her kids. Maybe she does have money, but it came from an inheritance of a loved one she recently lost. As for her kids, well, possibly she bribed them with some ice cream on the way home if they could get through the morning without any fights or tantrums.
The point is…she’s NOT perfect. No one is. Others may be more “put together” or more fortunate than us in this particular stage of life, but they’re still facing their own battles. No amount of money, good genetics, good physique or well-behaved children will give you perfect peace and contentment.
The “Right” kind of Comparison
Only ONE can do that for us. Our Lord and Savior is the only idol we should have. He’s the only real example of perfection we can look to. He’s the ONLY one we should be comparing ourselves to.
Our daily goal should be to model Jesus in our own lives more and more. Each day, we should look just slightly more “Jesus-like.”[bctt tweet=” Others should look at us and not want to be us, but want to know our God.” username=”groundsandgrace”] They should see an overabundance of love pouring from us. They should see us as women who don’t compare ourselves or envy other women, but cheer others on and give them encouragement.
We’re fragile, imperfect beings and comparing ourselves only weakens us. It makes us more vulnerable to the schemes of Satan. He’s the one whispering all those negative self-thoughts into your head. He’s the one telling you that you’ll never be good enough, because you’re not like that “perfect” woman.
Stand Firm
We’re fragile, imperfect beings and comparing ourselves only weakens us. It makes us more vulnerable to the schemes of Satan. He’s the one whispering all those negative self-thoughts into your head. He’s the one telling you that you’ll never be good enough, because you’re not like that “perfect” woman.
No, you’re not at all like that “perfect” woman and never will be. Not because you’re not good enough, but because you ARE. [bctt tweet=”You’re good enough to be YOU…exactly how God made you.” username=”groundsandgrace”] You’re His “workmanship,” His prized possession, His creation and His daughter. Those qualifications alone make you good enough. God doesn’t mess up or make mistakes, so take pride in who He made you to be.
That “perfect” woman is His creation too and we should be celebrating that with her, not wishing we could be her. We’re all sisters in Christ and created by the same hands that formed the entire world. I don’t know about you, but that fact alone gives me pride in my Creator and the fact that I’m part of His plan at all. Let’s all celebrate that together and thank Him for that.
Comparison is Hard! I’m the first to admit that I struggle, constantly, with it. None of us will completely overcome it while we’re still on the earth, but we do have hope. We have hope in a Savior who died for each one of us and wants a real and personal relationship with us. We have hope that this world is not our forever home, and someday we’ll live free of any comparison at all.
The Resolution
For now, let’s focus on our perfect God and not what we perceive as “perfect” in others. Let’s cling to His word and let it tell us who we are. Let’s try comparing ourselves more to Jesus and less to those “perfect” women around us.
Sister, we can do this. Not on our own, but with the help of our Father. He knows us more intimately than anyone else and can help us overcome our deepest struggles of comparison. [bctt tweet=”I’m determined to become someone who loves Jesus more and compares myself to others less.” username=”groundsandgrace”] I want to be content with who I am in Christ and I pray that you all will as well.
I’ll leave you with this bit of encouragement from the Word of God…
“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. ~Ephesians 2:10
Marlene L Dicken
I really needed this advice back when I lived in New Albany, Ohio. What helped me in certain situations was remembering my Dad telling me that “no one is better than other.” I reminded myself of this when I would find myself attending a neighborhood party and I found myself standing alone. Offset would be clumps of Housewives of New Albany standing in a circle with mainly their backs turned against me. They would be dressed to the nines donning high heel shoes and clutching designer handbags while discussing a custom ordered couch and complaining that their housekeeper was slow at tasks! Some pretty sad moments even with my personality. One time I even purchased a designer pair of jeans and the compliment that was usually said, wasn’t said to me. After that, I gave up on trying or worrying about fitting in. I found humor in overhearing conversations of “I rented a bouncy house for my kids party and it was ONLY $400 or “Do my lips look natural?” (no you look like a clown) lol Anyway, I don’t hold a price tag on myself anymore. My God value is impressive enough. 😉